Editing Child Abduction is Not Funny (section) Warning: You are not logged in. Your IP address will be publicly visible if you make any edits. If you log in or create an account, your edits will be attributed to your username, along with other benefits.Anti-spam check. Do not fill this in!==Story== ===Description=== A child molester makes a failed attempt to abduct Tweek. This triggers a massive overreaction from the South Park parents. They decide to build a wall around the entire town. The owner of City Wok, Tuong Lu Kim, is commissioned to do it. (Basically because he's Chinese, and the Chinese have so much experience building big walls.) To make things even more "secure," the parents outfit their kids with a device called Child Tracker -- a helmet with a satellite dish that the boys have to wear at all times. Things don't go as planned. Mongolian nomads show up and continually attack the new wall. Then, when a news report states that children are most often abducted by a parent, the adults decide that the children aren't safe around themselves, and banish all their kids outside the wall. With no other choice, the children join forces with the Mongolians and manage to blow a hole in the barrier, reuniting them with their parents. The boys return home, secure with the knowledge that living in fear is never the answer -- and that their parents are idiots. ===What I Learned Today=== "You know who was right all along? The Mongolians. They knew that you just can't wall yourself off from the outside world. Putting walls up never helps anything. Tearing them down brings us together." ===Memorable Quotes=== * "Rabble, rabble, rabble, rabble, rabble!" Townsfolk * "Why did you go and have to be abducted, Tweek? Now all our parents are freaking out!" [[Kyle]] * "God-damned Mongorians!" [[Tuong Lu Kim]] * "Dude, sometimes I think our parents are really stupid." [[Stan]] * "My son has become a Mongolian? No! NOOOOO!" [[Sharon Marsh]] * "Bang. You're dead, Tweek." [[Richard Tweak]] * "Good Then why don't you get into the back of my van and I'll drive you home." Ghost of Human Kindness * "Just because I'm Chinese doesn't mean I go around building walls! I'm just a normal person like all of you, I eat rice and drive really slow -- just like the rest of you! I'm not a stereotype!" [[Tuong Lu Kim]] * "Gee what a surprise. I guess Mongolians aren't such crappy, smelly people after all." [[Tuong Lu Kim]] * "You have to get out of here before we abduct you." [[Randy Marsh]] * "Wait I learned some Mongolian in college." [[Randy Marsh]] Summary: Please note that all contributions to South Park Wiki may be edited, altered, or removed by other contributors. If you do not want your writing to be edited mercilessly, then do not submit it here. You are also promising us that you wrote this yourself, or copied it from a public domain or similar free resource (see South Park Wiki:Copyrights for details). Do not submit copyrighted work without permission! Cancel Editing help (opens in new window)