Editing Goobacks (section)

==Story==

===Description===
Humans from the year 3045 use a time portal to visit our century in search of employment. But the "Goobacks" (so named because they arrive covered in goo) work so hard and so cheaply that they take tons of jobs away from South Park residents.  In a matter of days, the boys lose their snow-shoveling gigs to migrants who do the same work for only 25 cents, and Stan's parents hire a Gooback housekeeper for ten cents an hour.

The townspeople are growing uneasy with the exploding Gooback populace -- many folks are now unemployed, and even more are just plain pissed off.  [[Mr. Garrison]] is even forced to teach his class in both English and "Future Speak," the native language of the Goobacks.  

Things come to a head at the local fast food joint Wendell's Burgers, when [[Stan]] can't get the immigrant workers to understand his order. After several attempts, he loses it and calls them "f***ing Goobacks."  His parents overhear this and ground him for being an ignorant "timecist."But when a Gooback replaces Stan's dad at work, [[Randy]] becomes equally pissed off.

In an effort to stop the Goobacks, the local males form a well-thought-out plan: turn gay, so that future generations of job-takers will never be born.  They go to Little Future (the Gooback part of town) and proceed to start having sex with each other in a big, sweaty, man pile.

Stan suggests that perhaps instead of everyone turning gay, they should try to work for a "better future."  That way, the Goobacks won't need to come back in time. This strikes a chord with the man pile.  

With the help of a montage, South Park residents start planting trees, recycling, giving food to the poor, and being all-around good people. It seems to work, as one-by-one the immigrants vanish into thin air.

There's just one problem. Stan and Kyle suddenly realize that all this save-the-world stuff is even gayer than the big orgy of man sex.  The men agree, quickly take off their clothes, and return to the man pile.

===What I Learned Today===
"I think it's wrong to call them Goobacks because they're no different from us. They're just humans trying to make their lives better. Look, it sucks that the immigrants' time is so crappy, but the cold hard truth is that if we let them all come back to our time, then it's just gonna make our time crappy too. Maybe the answer isn't trying to stop the future from happening, but making the future better."

===Memorable Quotes===
* "They took 'er jobs!" [[South Park Residents]]
* "Ouch, ma'am, please let go of that tight grip you have on my balls." [[Cartman]]
* "You're breakin' my balls, ma'am." [[Cartman]]
* "I want a godddamn cheeseburger and some goddamn fries you fucking Goobacks!" [[Stan]]
* "If we can get everyone to turn queer, then there won't be no children to have no children, and the people from the future won't exist to take our jobs!" [[Darryl Weathers]]
* "We're trying to turn everyone gay so that there will be no future humans! Present-day America number one!" [[Randy]]
* "All you ever do is talk about your balls!"  [[Kyle]]
* "Stan Marsh, how dare you use that time-bashing slur!"  [[Randy]]
* "We're not raising our son to be an ignorant Timecist!"  [[Sharon Marsh]]
* "Which kind of verb is this? 'The sad girl puts balls in her mouth' -- or in future speak, of course, 'Guack guack balls goack goack.'" [[Mr. Garrison]]
* "We can't understand you, asshole!"  [[Cartman]]
* "This is even gayer than all the men getting in a big pile and having sex with each other."  [[Cartman]]