Editing Krazy Kripples (section)

==Story==

===Description===
Jimmy performs stand-up comedy to a practically empty theater.  It turns out everyone in town has gone to see paraplegic and stem cell research advocate Christopher Reeve, who is slowly regaining his strength by sucking the juices out of fetuses. Jimmy and Timmy, angered at the attention he receives, form their own "handicapped-from-birth" club -- The Crips. After learning that an organization with that name already exists (and mistakenly believing that it's also composed of people crippled from birth), they join its Denver chapter.

In order to prove their street cred, they're sent out to kill some members of a rival gang, the Bloods. The boys unwittingly accomplish this when a gasoline tanker, swerving to avoid them, crashes into gas station where Bloods gang members are haning out, killing everyone. Soon Jimmy and Timmy are rolling around South Park in their new gang colors, terrifying the populace.

Meanwhile Reeve's fetus-sucking habit not only restores him to full mobility, but then gives him superpowers -- and an insatiable desire for more and more fetuses. He founds his own Legion of Doom, which is committed to world domination and evil.  But Reeve is thwarted by Oscar-winning actor Gene Hackman (whom he refers to as "Hack Man"). Hackman and his followers help secure a ban on stem cell research, then imprison Reeve in another dimension and shoot him into space.

Jimmy and Timmy have problems of their own. When Jimmy's house is sprayed with bullets by the rival Bloods gang, he finally realizes how much trouble he's gotten himself into. But instead of running for cover, he decides to bring the two enemy gangs together by doing an all night "lock in" at the Denver Recreation Center.  After an impassioned speech in which Jimmy tells the rival gangs "I mean, come on," the two groups form a truce.  The Crips and Bloods become fast friends, and even perform a musical number together.

===What I Learned Today===
"I guess we all learned that trying to get along is way better than p. . .player hatin'."

===Memorable Quotes===
* "Tim and I would love to pop some punk-ass Bloods. We're terrific at it." [[Jimmy Valmer]]
* "I'm cool like a fool in a swimming ppp-ppp-pp-pp-pool." [[Jimmy Valmer]]
* "You were sent here through the vengeful and angry hand of God to teach your mother and I a lesson. And that's a big responsibility, son." [[Ryan Valmer]]
* "Tom, if irony were made of strawberries, we'd all be drinking a lot of smoothies right now." [[Reporter]]
* "Hey Timmy, how many able-bodied people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?  One!"  [[Jimmy Valmer]]
* "That must be what the fellas meant by 'pop some punk ass bloods,' they want us to get them Soda Pop and treats!"  [[Jimmy Valmer]] 
* "Why you be tripin', mom?"  [[Jimmy Valmer]]
* "Look, my gang, which I can't talk about because it's super secret, is the most important thing to me now.  And if you don't like it, you can just pass the blunt to the nigga on your left."  [[Jimmy Valmer]]
* "The old Christopher Reeve is dead!  From now on I am Chris!"  [[Christopher Reeve]]
* "The once immobile Mr. Reeve says his new organization will be committed to world domination and evil.  What an inspirational story, Tom."  [[Reporter]]
* "I mean, come on." [[Jimmy Valmer]]