Editing Stan Marsh (section)

==About==

Stanley "Stan" Marsh has always been your comparatively average all-American fourth grader... who happens to live in one of the most fucked up places on Earth. Whenever crazy things are happening in South Park, he and [[Kyle Broflovski|Kyle]] are there to provide the voice of reason and help resolve the problems, often with a comforting speech or at least some memorable highlights from ''Star Trek''. He has a highly abusive sister named [[Shelly Marsh|Shelly]], a gay dog named "[[Sparky]]", and is crazy in love with his longtime girlfriend, [[Wendy Testaburger]]. He's also quite good pals with the [[Super Best Friends (team)|Super Best Friends]], lead by [[Jesus Christ]], and was even entrusted with helping protect the immensely powerful prophet [[Muhammad]] for a time.

Like his father, Stan's a member of the Mountain Scouts, an aspect of his life that's cultivated a belief in honesty and integrity, leading him to tell the truth to the [[Space Police]] and to nominate [[John Edward]] for the 'Biggest Douche in the Universe' award for lying to people. He briefly served as the prophet of the religion/cult, the [[Church of Scientology]], but left upon discovering it was a lie and a scam. He is willing to lie and stretch the truth to suit his own needs in extreme situations, like when Kyle's 9/11 investigation lead him to discover Stan was [[Mystery of the Urinal Deuce|the kid who shat in the urinal]] or to avoid trouble when [[Toliet Paper|TPing houses]] or [[Butt Out|smoking]]. When traumatized, such as after learning about [[Mr. Mackey]]'s hoarding disorder, after discovering the secret of [[Fantastic Easter Special|Easter]], or during the "List" incident, he may care more about moving on than exposing the truth. 

He also often champions social and environmental causes, something he can sometimes take too far, and has a soft spot for causes related to animals. Despite his distate for environmentalism, he engaged in a tense stand-off with the [[Park County Police Department]] over veal abuses and lead the Sea Shepard to [[Whale Whores|save thousands of whales and dolphins]] as Captain, causing television ratings to soar but becoming a wanted criminal, and helped [[Willzyx|a whale to return to his family on the moon]]. Stan has been noted for his exceptional leadership abilities in times of crisis and high stakes such as these. He has also consistently championed gay rights since discovering his dog [[Sparky]] was gay, and helped the animals from [[Big Gay Al]]'s animal shelter. He does, however, exhibit an occasional fear of snakes.

It has been noted that he has exceptional weaponry skills for a fourth grader, illustrating proficiency with guns and has yielded a number of weapons, including [[Mystery of the Urinal Deuce|handguns]], [[Volcano|rifles]], [[Whale Whores|flareguns]] and [[Red Sleigh Down|assault weapons]]. He has also attended weekly karate lessons with [[Eric Cartman|Cartman]] and Kyle, learning much about "diciprine" as well as self-defense. More curious abilities include a knowledge of how to drive, if assisted by [[Kenny McCormick|Kenny]] at the pedals, and the ability to give abortions, which he subsequently taught some mountain lion cubs, according to Cartman anyhow. He also became involved in and made bold attempts to stop the [[Red Badge of Gayness|American Civil War]] and the [[South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut|second American-Canadian War]]. 

Stan's greatest talent may be his athletic abilities, which he is frequently praised for - he is the quarterback on the [[Cows Football Players|South Park Cows football team]] and creates controversy when he's missing at the big game, much to his Uncle Jimbo's worry. He's also on the [[Baseball Team]], the [[Cows Dodgeball Players]], lead the [[South Park Diggities]] dance troupe, and famously coached the [[Park County Pee-Wee Hockey Team]], inspiring a generation of children to never play hockey ever again. Like [[Lorde|his father]], Stan also has musical talent, being a member of two bands - [[Fingerbang]] and [[Moop]] - as well as [[Guitar Queer-O|being an ace Guitar Hero player]] and singing a [[Smug Alert!|hit song begging people to use hybrid cars]].

Stan is not without his faults. He has exhibited poor parenting abilities, with neither Wendy nor Kyle trusting him with an egg, Like the other boys, he can be ignorant and rip on unpopular kids like [[Butters Stotch]] or [[Scott Malkinson]] maliciously, and his ego can get in the way of his friendships, such as becoming caught up with his [[Guitar Queer-O|Guitar Hero skills]] or [[A Scause for Applause|getting carried away with social causes]]. On at least two known occasions, he ended up [[Butterballs|jacking it in San Diego, California]] after promoting such causes in web videos. Not to mention, he's a [[You're Getting Old|bit of a cynical asshole]], which he only keeps in check with [[Ass Burgers|a few swigs day of Jameson Irish Whiskey]].

Whenever things are looking their darkest and Stan needs guidance in his life, he knows there is always one voice he can turn to and rely on, wondering... what would [[Brian Boitano]] do.

===DNA Overview===
You are an average all-American person, and despite your crazy surroundings, you remain levelheaded. You may have a strange way of expressing your love for others, often not being able to control what comes out of your mouth. When all else fails, people with Stan Marsh DNA will ask themselves, “What would Brian Boitano do?”

"This is America and in America, if something sucks, you’re supposed to be able to get your money back.”